the unexpected expected transition.

It’s funny. If you know me, you know that I’m a planner. So when I found out that I was pregnant, I did everything I could to prepare myself. We had Lisa, who is an amazing birth coach help us out. I was on “The Bump” app 2/7 and I researched every sort of product my baby was going to either put on his skin or use. When we talked about having a natural birth, Lisa prepared me for the transition time. Which is supposed to be the moment during labor where every mom goes crazy before they see their baby. Let’s just say it was the most difficult time during childbirth. Even though I expected it to happen, I didn’t realize what it took to go through it. It was literally an unexpected expected transition.


Then talking to many moms and dads, they said that the first two months of raising a newborn are the hardest. For us, the months were definitely challenging. Everything was so new. We were learning our baby. Our baby was learning us. We were (and still are) the ultimate learning team. But man, it was the unexpected expected transition.


Then I always expected that I would go back to work full-time. I love the church and everything about it. Little did I know that God had other plans in mind (so grateful for pastors that guided me through this process with no judgment and much grace). I have never been in a part-time position before. I have always worked full-time. What an unexpected expected transition.


Going to college was a transition. My parents divorce was a transition. Life after college was a transition. Dating Matt. Getting married. Switching job roles. Pregnancy and motherhood- ALL transitions.

There are transitions that happen in our life that we don’t expect. Then there are transitions that happen in life that we expect but we don’t realize what it takes to go through it or what things are really is going to look like in the process. This can leave us feeling blindsided (I’m not sure which one is more difficult to grasp). Nonetheless, no matter what transition you may be in or eventually may face, TRUSTING God is ultimately where you need to put your



unsettled spirit.




Unexpected expected transitions come in all shapes and forms (spiritual, physical, mental, financial, geographical, etc.). How can we prepare our hearts for the switch?

ONE> We can pray. Sounds simple but sometimes I find this to be the hardest thing for myself. I’m not one to ask for help and I usually charge through things head on with my own strength. Can some of you relate?  Although a strength, it can also be limiting because we don’t ask for help. We need to reach out to God in moments of transition. You don’t have to be on your knees by your bed for hours praying (but if that’s your thing- you do you).  Sometimes prayers throughout the day sound like, “Lord help me with…” If you have a worry or concern or your inner critic comes out to play, turn those thoughts into prayers before they turn on you.

TWO> Choose one scripture that refreshes you and brings back your focus. Some days can be better than others when you are going through transition. Arm yourself in advance for the sucky day. So when it comes, you are ready to kick butt with a scripture to uplift you. You don’t have to buy into the lie but the truth that God actually has for you.

THREE> Get one person in your corner that you trust and that has your best interest in mind. Surround yourself with someone who knows what you’re going through, who will give you extra support when the going gets rough. They’re the people who hold you up when you feel like you want to buckle down.

FOUR> Embrace the season that you’re in because it will not last forever. And believe it or not, even in the worst seasons and transitions there is some good that comes out of either or. Don’t miss the glimmers of joy,  revelation and hope. Whatever you’re going through, God is going to use it to position you for whatever your next is.

FIVE> Be kind to yourself. If you’re going through an unexpected expected transition, it’s probably something you haven’t been through before. So don’t be too hard on yourself when you fumble or make a mistake. Be quick to forgive yourself and be quick to do the right thing. Pick yourself back up. Don’t allow yourself to get stuck. Learn. Don’t repeat it. Be an example to others and keep going.

SIX> And the most biblical of all… Turn up the freaking music. Ok, maybe not but joy is a powerful thing. Don’t wait for joy to come your way- make it. Sometimes you just need to act like a fool (gangsta rap, classical music, belt out Whitney Houston, or blast your house music). Do something that brings you joy. And of course, praise through the transition, even when you don’t feel like it. Don’t trust your feelings. Let your feelings catch up to what you confess.

Handle those unexpected expected transitions with grace and rest in knowing, ultimately,  God is leading you in a new area of growth.


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